Call of the wild
by BardDown
Summary: Ghost, MacTavish, and Roach take a vacation.
1. Chapter 1

Roach pulled his hat down over his eyes and leaded back in the boat. He yawned and closed his eyes as the sun warmed his body. It was the perfect day…..

" Roach! Ya gunna fish or just sit around lass?"

Never mind.

" Im not much of a fisher sir."

MacTavish hooked a worm on the end of his line and sent it out into the crystal clear water, followed by Ghost. The three men were taking a week long vacation in the captains log cabin, far up in the woods.

" Not so bad, not a fan of the worms." Ghost sighed contently, letting the fishing pole rest across his lap.

" Oi Ghost, can you hold my line?" MacTavish asked, handing the younger man the pole, who nodded and took it.

" Aye, watcha up to mate?"

The Scotsman turned away from the two and unzipped his fly.

" Taking a piss. Got a problem with that?"

" Ah, no sir."

" Alright then."

Roach giggled as his captain became pee shy.

" Hold on, I think its mores code" he announced at the sound of starts and stops hitting the water " Help, help, im old and I cant pee."

MacTavish zipped back up his fly and turned towards the sergeant.

" Stand up."

"… Why?"

" Just for a second, I want to show you something laddie."

Roach cautiously stood, nearly losing his balance in the small row boat.

" So, what do you-"

MacTavish shoved the smaller soldier into the water.

" NOT CALLED FOR!" Roach called as he surfaced a few feet from the boat.

" That's what you get for callin me old, ya prat!"

Roach looked around the water and smirked.

" Im going to look for treasure!" He announced, diving back under.

" That boy scares me." Ghost mumbled with a smile. MacTavish ignored this, his face suddenly concerned. He turned to the lieutenant.

" Am I that old?"

" Ey?"

" Am I?"

" Well, how old are you?"

"….. 35."

Ghost just stared, his mouth open. MacTavish raised an eyebrow.

" What?"

"…"

" What!"

" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

The captain rolled his eyes as Ghost doubled over, laughing wildly.

" Haha, very funny. How old are you then? Like 28?"

" IM 26!" The Englishman answered, still cackling.

" Yes, well, you know what? Both of you buggers can suck-"

Randomly Roach popped up from the water and grabbed the side of the boat.

" Hey guy! Look what I found!"

He produced a gold chain. Both other men stared at him in disbelief.

**This is based of the Adam Sandler movie " Grown ups" More chapters will be up soon.**


	2. Chapter 2

Ghost yawned and shifted to his side on the couch. He studied the dark, ominous room. Odd shapes, shadows, and forms loomed all around.

" Now I know why Roach didn't want to sleep down here…"

Soft thumps cut the silence as someone descended the nearby stairs. Ghost fell silent, watching the form as it passed the couch to the fridge only a few feet away.

It was MacTavish.

The older man opened the fridge and began to drink strait from the milk carton, half asleep.

Ghost couldn't resist. He silently rolled off the couch and crouched, sneaking his way over into the kitchen. He stopped right behind his captain, who was oblivious. He stood.

" We all have to drink that you know."

MacTavish jumped, spilling half the carton all over himself. He whipped around and threw a punch, but Ghost dodged and ducked back into the darkness.

" Ghost, this isn't funny…" The Scotsman warned as he inched nervously through the darkness towards the light switch, which was back by the couch. Scuffling sounded in the darkness.

" Im going to strangle you." MacTavish laughed as he reached out, trying to hide his utter terror.

He flipped on the light switch.

The large room was empty, the only thing out of place was the milk all over the floor back at the fridge.

" Were the bloody hell…."

" Oi!"

MacTavish looked up. Ghost was sitting on the top step of the stairs, sipping on a glass of milk. His face was a mix of joy and seriousness.

" A wee bit jumpy tonight laddie?" The lieutenant asked, mimicking his captains Scottish accent. MacTavish smiled.

" Im going to get you back for that."

" Ey? And how would you go about that?"

" You'll see. And by the way, your sleeping upstairs from now on, mate."

That morning….

Roach sat at the dining table, biting at an apple. He was the first up, as usual.

" Morning captain." The young man greeted an MacTavish walked down the stairs, a grin on his face.

" Hello Roach" He greeted, his hands behind his back " Mind doing a little errand for me, lad?"

Roach raised an eyebrow, suspicious. The last time he got sent on an errand, he got his balls kicked in.

" Depends, what am I doing?"

From behind his back the captain produced a jar, the lid perforated with holes.

" I need you to go nature hunting…"


	3. Chapter 3

MacTavish set the arrow up on the string bow.

" Heres the game" He explained " Im going to shoot this into the air, and the first person to run as it comes down losses. Its called arrow chicken."

Ghost raised an eyebrow and swallowed. He suddenly wished he had his mask, because the thought of the arrow piercing his flesh was terrifying.

" This safe, sir?"

MacTavish aimed the bow up at the sky.

" Nope."

Ghost looked around.

" Where's Roach?"

" Doing a little favor for me. You ready?"

"….. No."

" 3.…"

" Please don't."

" 2.…"

" This is a bad-"

MacTavish sent the arrow strait into the sky. Both men froze, staring up in suspense.

" W-were is it?" The lieutenant asked, searching the sky. His captain shrugged.

" We will see soon mate."

Ghost spotted the arrow as it made its way down, heading right for them.

" _Don't run. _He's_ not running, so I shouldn't. oh god, its going to land really close…."_

" Bloody hell!" The Englishman swore as he snapped and ran off into the trees.

The arrow landed.

It stuck strait up in the ground not an inch from MacTavishs foot.

" Scared are we laddie?"

Ghost stuck his head out from behind a tree.

" How did you know were that was going to land?"

" Experience."

That afternoon….

" Got what you wanted captain." Roach announced as he walked into the kitchen, the jar in his hands.

" Brilliant!" MacTavish complemented as he peered through the glass. Inside was a black spider, about the size of a fist. He took the jar and started towards the stairs.

" Ah, sir? What are you doing with that?" Roach asked, slightly concerned.

" Don't worry mate, I wont hurt it."

" Um, okay. Well, im going in the living room, if Ghosts asks, you found that thing yourself."

" Got it."

A few hours later…..

Ghost his towel off the rack and began to dry his hair. He looked into the mirror and smiled.

" Bloody hell I need a haircut…."

He turned around and froze in utter horror at what was on the wall.

Mean while….

Roach strolled down the hallway towards his shared bedroom.

" I wonder what exactly did MacTavish do with that-"

Suddenly Ghost came crashing out of the bathroom screaming…. In only a t-shirt and heart patterned boxers. Both men looked at each other.

An awkward silence fell over them.

" There…. Ah….. Was a spider in there."

"…. Right."

"…. You wont tell anybody about this, will-"

Ghost stopped at the sound of a click behind him. He spun around and found MacTavish, holding a camera.

" My my Ghost, im going to treasure these always."

The older man grinned ear to ear. Ghost clenched his fists.

" DAMMIT TAVISH!"

Both older men took off running down the hallway.

" This is going to be a long week." Roach sighed as he caught the spider in his hands and carried it to the window.


End file.
